Sometimes I Wonder

Sometimes I wonder,
What would I do if I was there two thousand years ago?
Would I commit my life to Thee for that thorny pilgrim road?
Or would I despise Your compassion and walk away with sorrow?

Sometimes I wonder,
What would I do if I witnessed Your miraculous healing?
Would I sing my praises with all my heart and soul?
Or would I ask for a sign from heaven or to Beelzebul I go?

Sometimes I wonder,
What would I do if I watched You standing on trial?
Would I boldly proclaim Your name and to death I follow?
Or would I deny you three times before the rooster crowed?

Sometimes I wonder,
What would I do if I stood at the feet of that cross?
Would I cry out for mercy and tremble with fear?
Or would I join the crowd in mockery and sarcastic jeers?

Sometimes I wonder,
What would I do if I saw that empty tomb?
Would I be amazed and rejoice and trust in the truth?
Or would I question and doubt and speak like a fool?

Sometimes I wonder,
What would I do if they told me You are alive?
Would I shout with joy and gladly declare Your greatness?
Or would I insist of feeling your pierced side like the doubting Thomas?

Sometimes I wonder,
What if I have wandered astray and stumbled on the way,
Will You still welcome me home with Your wide open arms?
And will You still search for the lost sheep and love the prodigal son?

‘Seventy times seven’, I heard You said;
And I know, I have been forgiven.

‘Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.’

Weybrigde: A bridge to a New Life?

I have moved to Weybridge on the 10th July, a day earlier than planned. This is because there was the Elton John concert on the 11th July and to avoid the traffic jam, my friends have decided to help me to move on Thursday. W&C were so kind to drive my luggage and myself to Weybridge at the late night on the 10th. I'd arrived at almost 12 midnight and by the time I'd unpacked it was pretty late. Nonetheless, as I woke up the next morning, boy did I really appreciate the short distance to the train station where I used to catch the free shuttle bus to the company at The Heights.The first impression that I had for Weybridge when I attended the first interview with S was that it is calm, peaceful and green. I also saw employees who had cycled to work up the hill to their respective companies.At that time, I was even thinking of cycling to work if I get this job.The second time I went back to S for the second interview, accessment and presentation, I knew back then that I have grown accustomed to Weybridge.There was somehow a weird pulling sense of belonging here.Hard to explain but I guess it's because I have always like nature-the calmness and the friendliness of the country men have always impressed me. I felt rather peaceful, quiet and calm. Never have I ever thought that Weybridge is actually a posh area , where many rich people lives here. Hence, properties' prices here soar high. I've just got to know today from a colleague who lives here that apparently there are many wealthy rich men , particularly from the Scandinavian and the Chelsea football players who live here or nearby. No wonder I remember seeing a group of kids learning horse riding while I was "riding" the bus.Even my housemate, who is half French and half British with an origin from India, owns a horse! Apparently, London city itself doesn't have much appeal to these countryside lovers. This area may be posh, to me it's kinda like a small town. Nonetheless, I like it sofar though I am yet to walk around and discover more of the area. There is also a canal which could be really romantic strolling and taking picture.Hmm, I guess probably I would venture myself into the country activities, in addition to the weekend city trips since Central London is only 35mins away by train. Hey, come to think of it-it is indeed a great opportunity to be able to explore both side of UK-the city and the countryside. Visiting is one thing, living is another. I am looking forward to explore Weybridge, perhaps a bridge to a new chapter of my life-both professionally and personally.

Present: Carpe Diem and The "S'es....

Today is the 29th June. The month of June is gonna end soon. But one thing I am pretty certain: I am gonna live the moment! A week passed since I was attached to S, based at Frimley. I really like the technology adopted in the buiding of the company, the facilities (i.e cashless, shuttle bus and yes, they have a gym in their buiding for the staff!) and the flexi hours in the company. The staff can choose to work from home (how cool!). I came to know that even if your role is not that highly ranked over here as compared to Malaysia, the level of responsibilities and independence expected are rather high. I remembered what my French Director once told me that working in Europe, even as an intern requires a lot of time and commitment. I could not agree less. Ha...nothing are really like Malaysia in terms of working style/culture. As I do admire Asians' commitment and diligence, I also really do admire the high sense of responsibilities and efficiency adopted by the Europeans. These are certainly some of the attributes that I've learnt over here at S.

As the month of June is coming to an end, follows by the month of July, I am again looking forward for another new journey. I will update you when the time comes. At the present, I am living the moment. As for tomorrow, it will be a mystery. As for the past, it's history. As for now-the present, I just wanna make the most out of my time here, it's a gift (that's why it's called the present;), so I am gonna appreciate it, work hard in righteousness and for His glory. As for the others, I'll leave it to Him.

Ironically, I can't help wondering whether the letter 'S' could have somewhat related or signified to me anything recently. Four companies begins with the letter 'S' has somewhat associated with me. Ive let go of a job opportunity by co S in Malaysia. Now I am attached to another company, S, who was mistaken for another co. S by the headhunter. Strangely, the upcoming company also starts with S. Haha...I wonder if there are more events with 'S'es lining up for my discovery..:)Good events, I hope.
I would like to think the coming 'S'es as Shining, Singing, Sweet, Safe, Strength,Sunny and errr...'Sexy'? haha:)Neh, perhaps more Sense of humor would brings more happiness and meaning to life:)Cheers.

Where God guides, He provides.

"If God tells you to do something, he will give you the energy, talent, resources – whatever you need – to do it. Where God guides, He provides. "

I have gone thru months of many diferent experiences-roller coaster months!. But He did provide. He did give me the energy, talent and resources to do it. Even now, I am still at the crossroads of a decision and I think many decisions more to come. I've learnt not too worry so much (Matthew 6: 24-34)

"So don't worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today's trouble is enough for today". (Matthew 6: 34).

I will not have survived till today if it's not for Him who provides. I left home alone, with so much aspirations and hopes to achieve but unexpectedly, the answers I was seeking were not what I've expected. It was ironically a twist of fate, which brought me to where and what I am now. I may not have achieved what I have aspired and wanted before I took the courage and board the plane from Malaysia to UK, but I guess God has a plan for me.Indeed He provides. Now that I reflect, He was holding my hands and guiding me all the way. I've made friends I never thought I really would. Ive learnt to forgive and forget (though am still learning).I have also learnt cooking from W and began to appreciate every little things in life. I've learnt a lot about kindness. "What goes around, comes around" (W, 2008).I am really grateful for all of the support from my friends-in everything. I am thankful that He is watching over me. Indeed, once the children of Christ, He will never, ever forsake you. I was drifted away,yeah, I'd backslided, somehow, He was so merciful. He forgives. It was thru my sis, who has given me the Study Bible on the day that I was flying to London, which has brought the desire and hunger of being close to Him. I'd never looked back since. He does provide, in the past, now and future. If we do our part, I believe He will do the rest. I choose to trust Him!

"And my God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus."- Philippians 4:19

"...........we followed that dream, even when it involved risks. If you’re going to live by faith, you’re going to have to take some risks. In some situations, you’ll wonder if God is going to come through. But keep believing – because where God guides, God provides."

(Source : http://www.purposedrivenlife.com/en-US/FreeTools/devotional/todaysDevo/Devotional.htm?a=2641&z=1)

Love?

I came across another message about love thru the facebook today and I find it quite meaningful...

"Sometimes, in our relentless efforts to find the
person we LoVe we fail to recognize & appreciate
the people who LoVe us.
We miss out on so many beautiful things & simply
because we allow ourselves to been slaved by our
own selfish concerns.
Go for the Person of deeds & not for the Person of words
for you will find rewarding happiness not with the
Person you LoVe but the Person who LoVes you more.
The best LoVers are those who are capable of
LoVing from a distance, far enough to allow the
other person to grow, but never too far to feel the
LoVe deep within your being.
To let go of someone doesn't mean you have to
stop LoVing, it only means that you allow that
person to find her own happiness without expecting
him to come back.
Letting go is not just setting the other person free,
but it is also setting yourself free from all
bitterness, hatred, & anger that keep in your heart.
Do not let the bitterness rare away your strength &
weaken your faith & never allow pain to dishearten
you, but rather let you grow with wisdom in bearing
it.
You may found peace in just LoVing someone from
a distance not expecting anything in return.
But be careful, for this can sustain life but can
never give enough room for us to grow.
We can all survive with just beautiful memories of
the past but real peace & happiness come only
with open acceptance of what reality is today.
There comes a time in our lives when we chance
upon someone so nice & beautiful and we just find
ourselves getting so intensely attracted to that
person.
This feeling soon become a part of our everyday
lives & eventually consumes our thoughts & actions
The sad part of it is when we begin to realize that
this person feels nothing more for us than just a
friendship.
We start our desperate attempt to get noticed & be
closer but in the end our efforts are still unrewarded
& we end up being sorry for ourselves.
You don't have to forget someone you LoVe.
What you need to learn is how to accept the
verdict of reality without being bitter or sorry for
yourself.
Believe me; you would be better off giving that
dedication & LoVe to someone more deserving.
Don't let your heart run your life, be sensible & let
your mind speak for itself.
Listen not only to your feelings but to reason as
well.
Always remember that if you lose someone today,
it means that someone better is coming tomorrow:
If you lose LoVe that doesn't mean that you failed
in LoVe.
Cry, if you have to, but make it sure that the tears
wash away the hurt & the bitterness that the past
has left with you.
Let go of yesterday & LoVe will find its way back to
you & when it does, pray that it may be the LoVe
that will stay & last a lifetime.

Life is Beautiful…
Take care & GOD Bless..."

Beautiful people

"The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity and an understanding of life that fills them with compassions, gentleness, and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen."

- Elisabeth Kubler-Ross

I came across this quote at the facebook as quoted as one of a friend's favourite.
This quote somehow captures my attention. I could not agree any less.

Forgive and Forget

I came to a link given by RT which says about biblical forgiveness.(http://www.purposedrivenlife.com/en-US/FreeTools/devotional/todaysDevo/Devotional.htm?a=2620&z=1.

What is actually forgiveness?
"Forgiveness is unconditional.
Forgiveness doesn’t minimize the offense.
Forgiveness doesn’t mean the relationship resumes without change.
Forgiveness isn’t forgetting what’s happened."

Also, it says here:
"The only way you can forget something is to actually refocus on something else. "

"God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them. "Romans 8:28 (NLT)

"Trust God, not your own judgment. He will lead you and clear the road for you"-Proverbs 3: 5-6.

I am learning to forgive and forget.