Forgive and Forget

I came to a link given by RT which says about biblical forgiveness.(http://www.purposedrivenlife.com/en-US/FreeTools/devotional/todaysDevo/Devotional.htm?a=2620&z=1.

What is actually forgiveness?
"Forgiveness is unconditional.
Forgiveness doesn’t minimize the offense.
Forgiveness doesn’t mean the relationship resumes without change.
Forgiveness isn’t forgetting what’s happened."

Also, it says here:
"The only way you can forget something is to actually refocus on something else. "

"God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them. "Romans 8:28 (NLT)

"Trust God, not your own judgment. He will lead you and clear the road for you"-Proverbs 3: 5-6.

I am learning to forgive and forget.

May Day

A new chapter will begin.I guess May would be another roller coaster month for me. But before I welcome May, I would like to (officially) close one of my most eventful adventure in the month of April.

This week brought me many news. Disapointment, maybe a tinge but perhaps the news signal paths, or perhaps gifts from God. I realize that maybe it is in God's plan, L UK is not for me. Perhaps also P. Ironically, I felt a relief, as if the burden on me has been lifted for a while. I have been seeking for answers of whether L is really meant for me. Somehow, it is not.

Also,when I have almost given up on S, it re-appear unexpectedly, I can opt to start in June. Is it really an indication from HIM? As I've mentioned, I really like the job nature and the prospects. But there are also other aspirations that I would like to give a shot. Haha...it reminds that sometimes in life, the more you wanna seek it, the more you can't reach it. Likewise, the more you try to avoid it, it came rolling in unexpectedly. How true this can be.

My friend, YP and her parents also came to London last Sunday. I revisited Bath with them. Nostalgia flooded within me. I came to Bath with my other 6 coursemates in Dec 2006. It was pretty rush trip but nonetheless great. I think back then, it was the camaraderie that matters. You've get to know people, the way they are -you laugh, argue and cry with them. But I guess that's what makes them so speacial. Also probably because we are so diverse,we have 'interesting' personalities. Suddenly, I could feel the breeze of time.Whew, years go by just like that.

I am planning for a holiday now as to give some space to my friend. So, I would have about 2 weeks plus to travel. I am still in the midst of planning, yet I still can't decide the timing to fit the places that I wanna visit.It has been quite a while since I last travel alone. I think it was in the year 2002, when I was in the Eastern Europe.I never thought that 6 years later I am doing this again, in this continent. Again,life is unexpected.

Another remark worth mentioning here is that during these 2 weeks, I had very good home cooked food. 'Bak kut teh', raw salmon (thanks W, but unfortunately, I don't really know how to eat raw fish), scallop porridge (thanks to YP mum), herbs soup (C's specialty) and many many more. Hehe, it also makes me wanna learn to cook. YP's mum is really a good cook, with all the 'techniques' of cooking great dishes. Wow, one day if I have the chance, I really wanna learn from her.

I don't know what is there set for me in the road ahead. But one thing for sure, I will take the challenges ahead in stride, at the same time, not to put pressures on myself. I've learnt and discover a few things these 2 weeks though: 1) I really like YP's parents, especially her mum. She is not only a good cook, but courtesy, respect, sense of humour, tolerance are the attributes that makes her a very good mum,wife and a person. I honestly think that YP's dad is a lucky man! 2) W, is also an 'unusal' man, he not only loves cooking but he is very good in it! Also, the way he cares for his wife and his wife's friends and parents makes him really a very unique and loving man. 3) I admire C's confidence and hospitality. Her unexpected experience during her @ traineeship and her courage somehow motivate me.

Another remarkable encounter...

I met T at MSN today,a friend whom I've met in Japan during the AIESEC APLDS conference in 2002. Apparently he has opened his own business,dealing with cars. N, a common friend of ours is also coming to London this June for a long term posting by his company while Y is teaching in Africa now. Apparently Y is doing some kind of volunteer work and N had a fast promotion to the role that he is holding now.Meanwhile, K is going to be a lawyer soon.Wow, how time really flies.

T, even invited me to help him out in Japan, if his business goes well. Apparently, it is doing good so far despite the recession. Wow, that's the power of networking! Or, perhaps that's the power of AIESEC as he also quoted that he got some useful business tips from his Kenyan friend. Meanwhile, I do sincerely wish him the very best of luck in his business.Not that I want a job from him but I really wanna see my friends to succeed. You know, I am indeed very proud of having such a entrepreneur and courageous friend. As for N, K and Y, it was a great honor knowing these outstanding talents! AIESEC brought us together and I do believe that somehow AIESEC has (partly) groomed us into what we are today.

I really hope to meet them again someday.

"Love you till The End" (by Pogues)

I just want to see you
When you're all alone
I just want to catch you if I can
I just want to be there
When the morning light explodes
On your face it radiates
I cant escape
I love you till the end

I just want to tell you nothing
You dont want to hear
All I want is for you to say
Why dont you just take me
Where Ive never been before
I know you want to hear me
Catch my breath
I love you till the end

I just want to be there
When we're caught in the rain
I just want to see you laugh not cry
I just want to feel you
When the night puts on its cloak
I'm lost for words don't tell me
All I can say
I love you till the end

Gerard Butler Love you till the end by the Pogues

I came across this book recently. It reminds me of the time when I've watched this movie in the romantic city of Paris!It was a very touching movie. I love this song as well-perfect setting with a beautiful song and story line. It kept me wondering though, does true love exist in this real world? I think it does,one just gotta seek it...

The journey continues...

22/4- Spoke to TW, the COO of FC. I really like his frankness and honesty. He gave me a very good first impression of yet another Irish (though I thought maybe he is from a Polish parentage from his surname).It was an unexpected arrangement, really. It reminds me of one of the most rarest and ironic moments in life.:)

23/4- Met and spoken to HM and MS of L UK. A pretty casual meeting- kind of like a 'get-to-know you better' meeting. It was quite an experience. At least I've given L one final shot. Then, we'll see what's God's plan for me, if L is really meant for me.

6pm: Met with the landlord and collected the deposit on behalf of the other housemates. LM came to assist me in packing and etc.Ahh, what an experience!
I don't mean to whine but today itself the landlord was late, I broke the wheel of my luggage bag and I lost my ticket in the tube. But eventually, all turn ok as landlord has no issue on the house.I just need to pass the cheque to B to distribute the money to the rest. I was pardoned for the missing tickets-it was nice of the officer at the counter. Thank you, sir! As for my bag, I guess I just gotta get another one. Nonetheless, I do count my blessings...

7.45pm: Moved to another friend's place at Zone 6. The place is pretty quiet but a nice residential area though it's pretty far from the city centre. But I guess this place surely has something to offer-I am yet to explore and discover. C came and picked me up.

8pm: Had dinner with C and her hubby. They are really a loving couple. Her hubby cooks superb Chinese food. It was 'world class standard'. Well, maybe I exaggerate a little but his parents used to open a restaurant, so u can guess the standard if his cooking. We had sour cabbage with meat, green vege, grilled duck and sweet and sour hot dog.I felt the warmth of a family again. It's really comfy here, they have a really nice 2 bed-room apartment filled with love and warmth. It's like a real home here. I certainly thank God for knowing such a lovely couple.

24/4-It is rainy here in the very West of London but I guess not a bad day to start as I have several calls and some appointments coming up. So, we'll see how things turn out.

I think my journey in UK will certainly not be easy- as I've foreseen before I come here. Somehow, I do have several expectations and I do have intentions to discover and explore certain things these few months of my life in this part of the world. I do seek for answers in certain areas. I am in the process of seeking, discovering and exploring. Sometimes I am disappointed, but at this time of darkness and uncertainties, I certainly know who my true friends are. Ironically, at certain times, strangers became friends. It also test my faith and I really appreciate the blessings from Him. It is definitely not a smooth path-it surely gonna be rocky at times, perhaps I would be splashed with "mud" at certain times, alone in the 'dark forest', cold and with the greatest fear you can ever imagine. Friends said I am brave and that I have the courage to go ahead but frankly I am yet another vulnerable human being. I will go through this process, certainly, at least for another month. I told myself it is the journey that matters. I think there is no failure but the experience and reactions to them. I guess at certain point in our life, we have to make decisions, stick to it and never look back...I pray for strength.

Journey to London...

21/3- Collected my IGS visa.

4/4- Last day of work @ LM . I did enjoy my time at LM. Trend analysis and the interactions with my colleagues and friends were indeed a very good opportunity for a transition to the real business working world again. I do appreciate every seconds I was there.In fact, I came in again and this time I do have a different perspective of looking at things and resolving issues. I genuinely felt that at that moment, my 16 months of studies and experience in Europe has groomed me into a 'different' individual. I see things holistically now, I became more matured (a colleague claimed so),open hearted,realistic and perhaps more spiritual? -(I desire to seek God's guidance).

5/4- Left for Melaka, met KC, HP, A, I, S (the ex-AA staff) for supper/gathering.
6/4- Reunion with family, witness the plaque and photo fixing on my dad's ashes @ Melaka.
6/4 (night)- Flight to London, was sent off by two of my lovely sisters.

7/4- Transit at Bangkok, had the Thai traditional massage :)
7/4 (7.15am London time)- arrive at London, took the tube to Bermondsey.
7/4-afternoon, checked mail-got a great job offer from S. I really like the job nature and the career prospects.It requires extensive travelling to the company's properties across the world!! I have to make a choice.

12/4-Went for a movie with B, J and N. We watched "The Other Boleyn Girl". A great movie to watch in UK, especially the setting was in Tower Bridge which is only about 20-30 mins walk from the place I am staying.Cool,huh. Also, had "Pad Thai" (Thai noodle cooked with Thai chilli sauce and shrimp)in a nice Thai restaurant at South Kensington.

13/4-Met LM, a friend of HP. We went around the Tower Bridge amongst the busy streets in the event of the London Marathon.It was cool witnessing these "tough" people running in the midst of the cold and rain.

16/4-Visited LM at her place at Zone 1. She cooked instant noodle, cucumber,carrots and minced meat. It's simple but yet delicious.

18/4- Got a message from LM-she got a job after the interview today! Happy for her.Supposed to go to the Malaysian Hall with her but I guess we decided to go next time. I will go to church later, was invited by a housemate. Look forward to meet more friends:)